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Joking Around

Journal Entry: Wed Oct 1, 2008, 9:12 PM
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Sorting through some old emails I haven't forwarded....


Maybe I just like thinking about that cat's facial expression....I'm probably going to hell for posting this lame joke at all....but I bet some of you will find it cute!

THE PASTOR'S CAT...This particular story just made me laugh. Every time I think about it,the vision of that poor cat just amuses me to no end. Hope the story leaves a bright spot in your day.

Dwight Nelson recently told a true story about the pastor of his church.

He had a kitten that climbed up a tree in his backyard and then was afraid to come down. The pastor coaxed, offered warm milk, etc. The kitty would not come down. The tree was not sturdy enough to climb, so the pastor decided that if he tied a rope to his car and pulled it until the tree bent down, he could then reach up and get the kitten.

That's what he did, all the while checking his progress in the car.

He then figured if he went just a little bit further, the tree would be bent sufficiently for him to reach the kitten. But as he moved the car a little further forward, the rope broke. The tree went 'boing!' and the kitten instantly sailed through the air - out of sight.

The pastor felt terrible. He walked all over the neighborhood asking people if they'd seen a little kitten.

No. Nobody had seen a stray kitten.

So he prayed, 'Lord, I just commit this kitten to your keeping,' and went on about his business.

A few days later he was at the grocery store, and met one of his church members. He happened to look into her shopping cart and was amazed to see cat food. This woman was a cat hater and everyone knew it, so he asked her, 'Why are you buying cat food when you hate cats so much?'

She replied, 'You won't believe this,' and then told him how her little girl had been begging her for a cat, but she kept refusing. Then a few days before, the child had begged again, so the Mom finally told her little girl, 'Well, if God gives you a cat, I'll let you keep it.'

She told the pastor, 'I watched my child go out in the yard, get on her knees, and ask God for a cat. And really, Pastor, you won't believe this, but I saw it with my own eyes. A kitten suddenly came flying out of the blue sky, with its paws outspread, and landed right in front of her.'

Lesson learned: Never underestimate the Power of God and His unique sense of humor.




This story is more the sort of religious humor I can relate to.....


A priest, a minister and a rabbi are playing golf. They decide to make it interesting, be wagering on the game but since gambling is a sin, the minister proposes a thought: "We'll draw a circle on the ground and at the end of the round we'll take all the money and throw it up in the air. Whatever lands inside the circle, we'll give to God."

The priest, not to be outdone, says, "I like that idea, but what about doing it another way? We'll throw the money up in the air and whatever lands OUTSIDE the circle, we'll give to God."

The rabbi give it a little more thought and with a twinkle in his eye says, "Let's go you one better. We throw the money up in the air and whatever God wants, he keeps."




Or better yet, this one....


A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says, "What is this, a joke?"




And finally, a short fairy tale to read before bedtime....or to get you kicked out of bed whenever you tell it to your spouse....


"One day.....a very long, long time ago there lived a woman who did not whine, nag or bitch.

But this was a long time ago.......and it was just that one day.

The End"

-=b=-




Stamps, stamps, stampie stamp stamps!


I have finally collected so many stamps that they don't fit into a single journal. I have organized them into a series of journal entries depending on arbitrary categories I devised myself. Here are the links:



Featured Artist

In the interest of trying to keep this entry short (and save my limited online time for catching up on some of the hundreds of deviations in my message center), I'm going to skip the featured artist link this issue and urge you instead to write a new journal entry of your own featuring one of your favorite artists on dA. Spread the love, folks!





Clubs

Devious Comments

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:iconaltergromit:
^______^ ..... ....Thank you Bill for this journal! :heart: :aww: :hug:

--
A dog is a man's best friend: where would Wallace be without Gromit? ;)
:iconcommandorxaburame:
XD

Youv just brightened my day!

--
[ Ex-po-zure [link] ]
Project Reciprocation! [link]
:iconvhartley:
Nice. Thanks for the laughs. :) :hug:

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dA | CafePress | RedBubble | Zazzle
:iconbakerjake:
Funny, but there really is NO way that's a true story.

--
[link]
:iconelectricdawn:
Thank you for making me smile :hug:

--
:sun: It's the changes that shape my life!.......I draw therefore I am :bug:...Madness is just a state of mind:psychotic: :crazy:
:iconphoenixphyre:
:rofl: Ohhhh, that poor cat. I enjoyed these. Thanks for sharing them with us :hug:

--
Phoenixphyre :flame:

"Art is not just a matter of externals, of appearances and form. Art is an expression of the artist's inner spirit. A brilliant, radiant spirit is what makes for a great artist."
-Daisaku Ikeda

Shoutbox

=rocamiadesign:iconrocamiadesign:
:wave: :hug:
Fri Dec 5, 2008, 2:50 PM
=altergromit:iconaltergromit:
Hello there!!! :D :heart:
Wed Nov 5, 2008, 9:29 AM
*Marsille:iconMarsille:
:love:
Thu Oct 2, 2008, 1:40 AM
*sevenwillow:iconsevenwillow:
c'est la vie!
Wed Mar 5, 2008, 8:19 PM
*phoenixphyre:iconphoenixphyre:
:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
Fri Jan 25, 2008, 7:14 PM
=Tre-Sedici:iconTre-Sedici:
:hug:
Thu Jan 24, 2008, 12:37 PM
*sevenwillow:iconsevenwillow:
when life hands you lemons find your feet to dance my friend. :hug: Love you two :)
Thu Jan 17, 2008, 10:29 PM
=Tre-Sedici:iconTre-Sedici:
I caught papa smurf on my turf! LOL! I'm a poet and didnt know it!
Wed Jan 9, 2008, 1:52 PM
=Tre-Sedici:iconTre-Sedici:
Im such as ASS it's "ASSUME" not "assuming"...I fixed it by the way! :)
Sat Dec 8, 2007, 12:05 PM
*sevenwillow:iconsevenwillow:
Happy December 2nd day :D
Sun Dec 2, 2007, 11:20 PM
~zombierap21:iconzombierap21:
hello will ^^
Fri Nov 30, 2007, 4:28 PM
=altergromit:iconaltergromit:
HI BILL!!! :heart:
Thu Nov 29, 2007, 1:12 AM
*sevenwillow:iconsevenwillow:
will work for chocolate :drool:
Sun Nov 11, 2007, 7:50 PM
~zombierap21:iconzombierap21:
wazzzaaaupt : :aww:
Thu Sep 6, 2007, 8:07 PM
~SalvamoreMali:iconSalvamoreMali:
We :heart: love :heart: you too :love:
Fri Aug 17, 2007, 10:27 PM
=wm-d:iconwm-d:
I :heart:love:heart: my friends! :blowkiss:
Sat Aug 11, 2007, 1:28 PM
*sevenwillow:iconsevenwillow:
HI BILL! ::w00t:
Sun Aug 5, 2007, 10:31 AM
=altergromit:iconaltergromit:
:glomp: :heart: :hug: :heart: :cuddle:
Wed May 9, 2007, 11:16 AM
=altergromit:iconaltergromit:
HellooooOOOOooooOOOO!!!! :giggle:
Thu Mar 15, 2007, 7:24 AM
=teddybearcholla:iconteddybearcholla:
Hey hey hey!!! today is the first day of the rest of your life!!! :heart: :hug: :teddy:
Mon Jan 15, 2007, 7:52 PM

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